Death--Funerals

Today I attended a funeral. It was my aunt, my dad's sister, who passed away. She had turned 90 this past June. What made this even more sad was that her sister passed away this last April. To understand fully what I mean you must know that they were my dad's half sisters.


My dad grew up with his mom and dad. His parents split up when he was a teen. When he was in his early thirties he learned that his father was actually his step father. Turns out his biological father passed away when my dad was a baby (1 or 2 years old). No one ever told him about his biological father. At this time he also learned that he had two half sisters who were also fathered by his biological father. 


I can't imagine what he must have felt like today, knowing that the only connection to his biological father was gone. At the church ceremony I shed a few tears after looking over at him and saw him crying. I can't imagine what it must feel like to find a sibling later on in life and losing them a short time after. I began to think about how i would feel if I lost one of my 3 siblings (all younger); I would be devastated. It dawned on me that our lives are very short. It's as if our lives are on loan to us. We're born, we have a borrowed life, and then comes the day when that life is taken back. 

My grandma (mom's side) was there with us because she knew my aunt. My grandma could not stop crying. She kept talking about her funeral and when she passes away. I didn't want to hear any of it, but I did not say anything to her. She's turning 80 this September and it's sad to say, but she will pass on. It's just the circle of life. When that thought crossed my mind I started crying even more. Seeing my cousins and nieces/ nephews crying over the loss of my aunt (their mother and grandmother) made me take a step in their shoes. I can't imagine having to deal with the loss of one of my parents or even my grandma (my only grandmother left).


It seems that my grandma is prepared. I learned today that she has paid for her burial site and all major costs associated with the burial. My aunt (mom's sister) was telling me about it. She was asking me to make sure to remember some songs that the mariachi played at the burial (my grandma loves mariachi). Even my grandma was commenting about certain things. She said, "Make sure you stay until my grave is completely filled up with the dirt. Don't leave me alone above ground." I think it's crazy how older people come to terms with death.

After the burial we went to my cousin's house for lunch. I learned more about the past few months in regards to my late aunt. After her sister passed away in April she told my cousin and my parents that her sister would come for her. She said she wanted to be with her. Also, one of her granddaughters gave birth to a baby a couple months ago. The baby died after 6 hours. The talked days later about it. She told my aunt that she was going to try to have another baby and that she needed her to take care of the baby. My aunt responded to her by saying "Instead, I'll take care of your baby who's in heaven." It's as if my aunt knew her time was coming soon.


No one can push the thought of death aside and no one can escape it. It's a part of life. The only thing we can do is accept it and just think of how we can make this a life worth living. What will your family and friends remember you for? What would you want to be remembered for? Every cloud has a silver lining. Although my aunt passed away, she will not be forgotten by her family. She lived a full life and supported her family (did I mention she had 12 children?!?! That alone, is unbelievable!). I believe family is the greatest thing in life, it is what makes life worth living. 

[Sad to say, but this is the business that will never go out of business.]